Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will. Then you will receive all that he has promised.
It’s good to admit your flaws, it helps you to make corrections and change course. I waver when it comes to being patient. I can go for long stretches where I give my concerns over to God. Then I stumble, take them back, and become overwhelmed with anxiety. My hope is that God is building endurance in me, that one day the long stretches will become a constant form of devotion. We all stumble, but as God works to strengthen our resolve, we will gain the endurance needed to finish the race.